We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
