I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
