i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
