just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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