I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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