haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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