its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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