i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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