I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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