it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize
