He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Screwed.edu
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize
