butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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