You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Found the puke drawer
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
