erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Randomize
