just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
