when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
