You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
