STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Lo siento on account of my penis...
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
