Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
