i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
