Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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