Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
two words: eviction party
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
