White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
