i already hear my dad disowning me
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize