Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
