we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
