her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Randomize
