Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
