David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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