Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize