I must be too annoying 4 u.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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