How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
