Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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