Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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