I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Randomize
