I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize