We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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