so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
