Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
