Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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