Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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