It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
