he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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