allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Randomize
