Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
