we have officially mastered the walk of shame
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
