I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Randomize