Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
