If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
whose parrot is this?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
