Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
What a dumb baby whore.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
