before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
he thought i was a dude.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize