Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
